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Thread: Being bisexual

  1. #1
    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Being bisexual

    What does it mean to you?

    Do you feel more comfortable discussing it these days?

    Do you feel people truely understand/accept it? Or is there still alot of discrimination/misinformation? (i.e. you're just 'confused' you need to chose if you are gay or straight)

    Is it easier being a bisexual female than a bisexual male?

    Do you think there's enough support for bi people specifically? as opposed to being lumped into the LGBT banner? Research would suggest not as of all the larger sexual indentity groups, bisexual people have the worst mental health problems, including high rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicide.

    Discuss
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    Last edited by DaisyDreamer; 14-08--2013 at 08:22 PM.
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    Shed Junkie alices wonderland's Avatar
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    I'm keeping out of this one. I will say though. A mates daughter has confessed to being bisexual. I found her honesty and openness refreshing. I think it will be easier for this younger generation to except themselves for what they are/want to be and a good thing it is. Too many young people selfharm these days and as adults from the old ways of the world (our parents) I believe we owe them the room to grow.
    even a gypsy caravan is too much settling down.
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  3. #3
    Transcending cup of tipi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DaisyDreamer
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    i want the world to know .... haha
    Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone

  4. #4
    Difficult Character Muninn's Avatar
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    In short, I'm quite comfortable being bisexual, it doesn't bother me personally. I do have more of attraction towards women, but I also wouldn't discount anything with a man. Though saying that, I guess if you were needing to put a label on me, I'm a bi-romantic asexual (not quite sure about the last bit yet, come back to me on that one). It's just a label though, it is who I am, and I don't feel at all ashamed by it.

    I am comfortable talking about it, but only to certain groups of people, and only if they specifically ask. Most of my friends know, but I wouldn't tell my father or one of my brothers, as they're very, erm, traditional thinking... I also don't tend to mention it at work, for practical reasons - we often stay away overnight, and share rooms, and I don't want things to be uncomfortable with whoever I'm working with. Those that know, do accept it well on the whole... I do think it seems easier for bi women, than bi men - it seems that it is almost "sexy" in some ways (thinking of the whole threesomes fantasy that a lot of men have!), whereas men don't have that.

    I really don't think there is the support from the gay community, it is often like we are an after thought. I've noticed a lot of negativity from certain lesbians, and I've never figure out why, but you do get banter about being a "greedy bi". I tend to laugh that off though.
    Never Knowingly Understood
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  5. #5
    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    i want the world to know .... haha

    I am astounded by your intelligence and insight on this subject
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    Badger Lover <3 Lord Summerisle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by alices wonderland
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    I'm keeping out of this one. I will say though. A mates daughter has confessed to being bisexual. I found her honesty and openness refreshing. I think it will be easier for this younger generation to except themselves for what they are/want to be and a good thing it is. Too many young people selfharm these days and as adults from the old ways of the world (our parents) I believe we owe them the room to grow.
    That's so good to hear. I think it's important that people can express themselves, be themselves. Mental health is so important and the pressure young people get should they come out as gay/lesian/bisexual/transgender/whatever must be horrific. People get abusive, violent or just resort to plain ol' pointing and laughing at people for just being who they are. It's all forms of bullying. If we want a healthy society we need a healthy respect for all flavours of sexuality/gender.


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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    i want the world to know .... haha
    And that sort of comment, to me at least, even if intended with no malice whatsoever is one of the reasons why people feel pressured to not be honest about themselves.
    " There should always be a supply of cider and cupcakes..."
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    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Lord Summerisle
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    And that sort of comment, to me at least, even if intended with no malice whatsoever is one of the reasons why people feel pressured to not be honest about themselves.
    Totally
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    Transcending cup of tipi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Lord Summerisle
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    And that sort of comment, to me at least, even if intended with no malice whatsoever is one of the reasons why people feel pressured to not be honest about themselves.
    Load of shite.
    It was a jest comment after someone had written something on an internet forum. As in, open
    to the 'public''.
    Asking opinions on an open forum doesn't suggest any insecurities. '' ooooh, i think i'm gay/lesbian/bi , but because
    soemone on his keyboard made a ''funny'', i'm now pressured to say nothing to nobody !!!'' Yeah, that's how life works, does'nt it?
    Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone

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    Radiant Being emmadilemma's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Lord Summerisle
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    If we want a healthy society we need a healthy respect for all flavours of sexual/gender
    Just picking up on this point one of the things that impressed me so much about Thailand was their respect for their Transgender Lady boys. I can`t say if it`s completely across the board but in general it seemed to me that they were fully accepted as part of `normal` society. Maybe a Buddhist thing not sure but it was very refreshing to see and shows that it is possible!
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    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    Load of shite.
    It was a jest comment after someone had written something on an internet forum. As in, open
    to the 'public''.
    Asking opinions on an open forum doesn't suggest any insecurities. '' ooooh, i think i'm gay/lesbian/bi , but because
    soemone on his keyboard made a ''funny'', i'm now pressured to say nothing to nobody !!!'' Yeah, that's how life works, does'nt it?
    I don't find your comments offensive but I do find it shows a lack of empathy and smacks of school playground humour as well as being unnecessary and not relevant to the discussion I was obviously trying to start. UKH used to be a safe and supportive place where subjects could be discussed intelligently and with sensitivity. Sadly this no longer seems to be the case. I've had people message me in response to this thread as they don't feel confident enough to discuss openly.


    It is an open forum and you can post what you like but just because you can, does it mean you should? Where does it stop? Homophobia? Think about a comment like yours will have on someone less confident or secure in their orientation.


    In a recent survey by the EU Fundamental Rights agency, 63% of LGBT respondents said they do not reveal their sexual orientation to most people in their private and professional lives. Bi respondents, particularly Bi men were the least likely to be open about being LGBT.


    It may be a simple piss take to you but it might be a lot more to someone else.

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    I feel compelled to say, I initially experienced a certain amount of trepidation in coming out as bi, but once I did I experienced little or no hostility, a bit of good natured ribbing which I expected and took in the nature that it was meant. Having said that, I never told my last gf, and after deciding there were going to b no secrets between my current gf and I, had the hardest time telling her. She was absolutely amazing tho and actually shares my sexuality.
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    Transcending cup of tipi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DaisyDreamer
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    I don't find your comments offensive but I do find it shows a lack of empathy and smacks of school playground humour as well as being unnecessary and not relevant to the discussion I was obviously trying to start. UKH used to be a safe and supportive place where subjects could be discussed intelligently and with sensitivity. Sadly this no longer seems to be the case. I've had people message me in response to this thread as they don't feel confident enough to discuss openly.


    It is an open forum and you can post what you like but just because you can, does it mean you should? Where does it stop? Homophobia? Think about a comment like yours will have on someone less confident or secure in their orientation.


    In a recent survey by the EU Fundamental Rights agency, 63% of LGBT respondents said they do not reveal their sexual orientation to most people in their private and professional lives. Bi respondents, particularly Bi men were the least likely to be open about being LGBT.


    It may be a simple piss take to you but it might be a lot more to someone else.

    Christ, you talk about schoolground mentality, then moan because your clique isn't what it used
    to be due to newcomers.
    Anyway, i'll let you get on with what ever it is you are trying to achieve. I always believe that forums should
    be treated as if you were all in a pub backroom,or around a campfire, having a chat. If you'd have made
    your opening comments in those places i would have sang the same thing, pretty much obviously in jest.
    Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone

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    Hi all
    A good discussion, im bi meself - couldnt give a toss what people think of my persuasion, i didnt choose to be bi i just am.. ok i get slightly annoyed that some peeps think cos im bi i must just be sex mad and a slag.. like being one or the other is proper but both is just perv but really its the least of my probs! Was interested in why 63% of peeps dont reveal their gayness to other peeps, is it cos of a perceived intolerance of it or is it in our own heads? Sure there is serious bigoted twats out there but is it as much as we think or is it more about our own insecurities? coming out for me sorted the wheat from the chaff, blew off any non believing friends.. one lez friend had a problem with it like i was letting the side down or something, wanted me to be a man hater like her but havent got energy to hate, besides which i said if she hates men so much why does she spend so much time and effort trying to look like one?? Out of order i was by saying that but was a bit miffed... true i think bi men have it worse, but why? I wouldnt care if my bloke was bi. Love is love. Should be celebrated not ridiculed..
    Muninn, i thought your post started with "im short" just re read it and it says "in short" laughed my head off! Hes short and bi?!!!!

    Zoe
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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    Christ, you talk about schoolground mentality, then moan because your clique isn't what it used
    to be due to newcomers.
    Anyway, i'll let you get on with what ever it is you are trying to achieve. I always believe that forums should
    be treated as if you were all in a pub backroom,or around a campfire, having a chat. If you'd have made
    your opening comments in those places i would have sang the same thing, pretty much obviously in jest.

    Cup of tipi please dont go! Its all good debate, all good. I think maybe peeps misunderstood your comment, what did you mean?

    - - - Updated - - -


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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    Christ, you talk about schoolground mentality, then moan because your clique isn't what it used
    to be due to newcomers.
    Anyway, i'll let you get on with what ever it is you are trying to achieve. I always believe that forums should
    be treated as if you were all in a pub backroom,or around a campfire, having a chat. If you'd have made
    your opening comments in those places i would have sang the same thing, pretty much obviously in jest.

    Cup of tipi please dont go! Its all good debate, all good. I think maybe peeps misunderstood your comment, what did you mean?
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    exiled cornishman wandering gypsy's Avatar
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    hear hear cup of tipi,
    personally i have no axe to to grind either way each to their own, but this is an OPEN forum and if you cant take all views on the subject that do not agree with your views,why bother?
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    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    Christ, you talk about schoolground mentality, then moan because your clique isn't what it used
    to be due to newcomers.
    Anyway, i'll let you get on with what ever it is you are trying to achieve. I always believe that forums should
    be treated as if you were all in a pub backroom,or around a campfire, having a chat. If you'd have made
    your opening comments in those places i would have sang the same thing, pretty much obviously in jest.

    Where did I say it was due to new comers?? Things change over time, people flow in and out, peoples attitudes change, that's all.......nothing about a clique at all or I wouldn't still be here.

    If we were in a pub back room for round a campfire I would have challenged you too
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    Transcending cup of tipi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by mydogsinspace
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    what did you mean?
    Again , i think it's obvious what i meant, but how people choose to take it is up to them.
    ''Research would suggest not as of all the larger sexual indentity groups, bisexual people have the worst mental health problems, including high rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicide.

    Discuss''
    This was part of the first post , and i found it funny that after stating this, someone expected forum
    users to oiut themselves.
    Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone
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    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by wandering gypsy
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    hear hear cup of tipi,
    personally i have no axe to to grind either way each to their own, but this is an OPEN forum and if you cant take all views on the subject that do not agree with your views,why bother?
    So where do you draw the line? a pisstake comment is just that, fine I get that, but what if someone is struggling with how they feel? Do you not think that would invalidate them? You know me Harry, I don't often get riled by stuff and am willing to takle everybody's poiunt of view on board but this wasn't a point of view it was someones attempt at humour on what is a sensitive subject to some.
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  19. #19
    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    Again , i think it's obvious what i meant, but how people choose to take it is up to them.
    ''Research would suggest not as of all the larger sexual indentity groups, bisexual people have the worst mental health problems, including high rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicide.

    Discuss''
    This was part of the first post , and i found it funny that after stating this, someone expected forum
    users to oiut themselves.
    Ok it may have come across as a bit blunt and didn't actually get across what I was getting at...........point taken, but you don't have to be bi to discuss bisexualaity do you? I'm interested in EVERYONE'S opinion
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  20. #20
    Transcending cup of tipi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DaisyDreamer
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    .
    I don't often get riled by stuff and am willing to takle everybody's poiunt of view on board but this wasn't a point of view it was someones attempt at humour on what is a sensitive subject to some.[/QUOTE]

    You are a one aren't ya.
    You don't seem to get it. It was a pisstake AT YOU, not the subject. Again , you mention how sensative it is, then
    whack a questionaire about it on A PUBLIC FORUM.
    You have already tagged my post with homophobia. Ta for that.
    Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone

  21. #21
    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    at no point did I call you homophobic
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  22. #22
    Transcending cup of tipi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DaisyDreamer
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    at no point did I call you homophobic
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    ''It is an open forum and you can post what you like but just because you can, does it mean you should? Where does it stop? Homophobia? Think about a comment like yours will have on someone less confident or secure in their orientation.''

    Not direct, but the tone was there wasn't it?

    I am deffo out of this now, i really cannot be arsed with bitching with you.
    Tell ya what, I would not feel so all alone

  23. #23
    Annoyingly Positive Editor DaisyDreamer's Avatar
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    No it was merely to make a point.......I sincerely apologise if you took it that way.
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  24. #24
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    Originally Posted by cup of tipi
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    Again , i think it's obvious what i meant, but how people choose to take it is up to them.
    ''Research would suggest not as of all the larger sexual indentity groups, bisexual people have the worst mental health problems, including high rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicide.

    Discuss''
    This was part of the first post , and i found it funny that after stating this, someone expected forum
    users to oiut themselves.
    Oh ok, it wasnt obvious to me but im a bit slow on the uptake.. i see what you mean now... ah its the way you tell em i guess.. can see both sides. Meanwhile back at the ranch, its a good discussion keep going!

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