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Thread: Show us your co-sleeping set up

  1. #1
    Not Quite a Noobie miku's Avatar
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    Show us your co-sleeping set up

    Hey everyone.
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    Newbie here (to posting and parenting).

    My son is 8 weeks old. We live in a 1 bedroom flat and co-sleep. I love having him with me and it makes night time breastfeeding easier. I thought it would be fun to share pics of our co-sleeping set ups. So I'll start things off.


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    We side car it with a cheap cot bed I got from Ikea. I used bungee cords to secure the cot to my bed, and pool noodles down the side so his mattress is flush with mine.
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    Ah that looks lovely! Very cosy
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    I misread it at first and thought it said you had pot noodles down the side and I was wondering how that worked lol
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    I've no pics as my son's 14 now and co-sleeping was very frowned upon so I never told anyone but for the first few months he slept in a moses basket on the bed next to me. Then he went into a little rocking crib that was mine as a baby and that stayed next to the bed for however many more months. Then he did go into a cot in his own room and slept very well for about a year. Problems started when he was about two and a half and I almost had a nervous breakdown trying to get him back to sleep in his own bed each time, it was exhausting. Looking back I should have just moved him back in with me but everyone said it was a bad idea so I didn't.

    Then I read The Continuum Concept when he was about 4 and at that point started letting him into bed with me when he wanted to. That went on until he was about ten (he's got special needs so is a lot younger mentally and used to get up several times in the night anyway). Again I didn't tell anyone because I knew everyone would freak. He just grew out of it on his own and now he goes off to his room, shuts the door and I'm not allowed in
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    Not Quite a Noobie miku's Avatar
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    Thank you
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    I love being close to him. Although who knows how long that will last lol. Hahaha imagine pot noodles sprawled across my son's cot!

    So you were co sleeping before it even had a name. Awesome. It's sad how much we let the opinions of others affect our lives, but your instincts sound on point. I'm not surprised things got easier once you had him back in with you
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    Shed Junkie alices wonderland's Avatar
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    My daughter co-sleeps. Like you she has a cot/ own bed adjacent. So can move freely between cot and main bed. She still brest feeds at 17 month. It has been a blessing for both mum and daughter co-sleeping.
    I do think you will need to remove that small table lamp by the new year though. Any tat that the boy shouldn't get hold of, he will.
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    Originally Posted by miku
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    Thank you
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    I love being close to him. Although who knows how long that will last lol. Hahaha imagine pot noodles sprawled across my son's cot!

    So you were co sleeping before it even had a name. Awesome. It's sad how much we let the opinions of others affect our lives, but your instincts sound on point. I'm not surprised things got easier once you had him back in with you
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    Yes I went against my instincts when he was little and it was a mistake. I was a very nervous new mum and didn't have much support so I was very 'by the book' and did everything I was told by the HV/midwife. Of course as time passes you discover that their 'advice' changes quite regularly and they're just repeating what they've been told is the right thing at the time. The Continuum Concept was a real game changer for me, you know how some books just really make sense? And suddenly things that had felt wrong seemed very obviously wrong so I started doing what felt best instead. Although I have to say when he was still getting in with me at the age of ten I was worried he'd never leave, lol, but he did in his own time, as they do with everything.

    It's interesting to me that he is very confident and relaxed even though he has a lot of health problems and I do wonder if it's anything to do with letting him separate in his own time? Not a question we can answer, in all likelihood.

    Anyway - you enjoy all the snuggle time and closeness, it goes very quickly and whilst it's nice to see them grow up and become men I do miss the cuddles
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    Not Quite a Noobie miku's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by GivingItThought
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    Yes I went against my instincts when he was little and it was a mistake. I was a very nervous new mum and didn't have much support so I was very 'by the book' and did everything I was told by the HV/midwife. Of course as time passes you discover that their 'advice' changes quite regularly and they're just repeating what they've been told is the right thing at the time. The Continuum Concept was a real game changer for me, you know how some books just really make sense? And suddenly things that had felt wrong seemed very obviously wrong so I started doing what felt best instead. Although I have to say when he was still getting in with me at the age of ten I was worried he'd never leave, lol, but he did in his own time, as they do with everything.

    It's interesting to me that he is very confident and relaxed even though he has a lot of health problems and I do wonder if it's anything to do with letting him separate in his own time? Not a question we can answer, in all likelihood.

    Anyway - you enjoy all the snuggle time and closeness, it goes very quickly and whilst it's nice to see them grow up and become men I do miss the cuddles
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    I must check out that book! It is so easy to listen to everything out medical "professionals" say, but nothing beats a mother's instinct. You did well! My son had jaundice when he was born. I couldn't shake the desire to get him out in indirect sun light as soon as we left hospital. After a few days of being outside his jaundice went and he didn't have to go back into hospital!
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    Not Quite a Noobie miku's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by alices wonderland
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    My daughter co-sleeps. Like you she has a cot/ own bed adjacent. So can move freely between cot and main bed. She still brest feeds at 17 month. It has been a blessing for both mum and daughter co-sleeping.
    I do think you will need to remove that small table lamp by the new year though. Any tat that the boy shouldn't get hold of, he will.
    That's awesome you're still breastfeeding! We had a very difficult time for the first few weeks with breastfeeding but I'm so glad I didn't give up. I hope to still be doing it at 17 months too! Lol thanks for the advice about the lamp. My whole house needs to be child proofed soon.
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    Originally Posted by miku
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    I must check out that book! It is so easy to listen to everything out medical "professionals" say, but nothing beats a mother's instinct. You did well! My son had jaundice when he was born. I couldn't shake the desire to get him out in indirect sun light as soon as we left hospital. After a few days of being outside his jaundice went and he didn't have to go back into hospital!

    It's a great book, Miku. I forget the name of the author now but she's a psychologist and has spent her career studying tribal groups, mostly Native American Indians. Her conclusions were that their communal lifestyles were incredibly healthy and that co-sleeping, co-parenting and the lack of parent/child separation were all doing great things for confidence and self esteem. Apparently the mums rarely, if ever, suffer from post natal depression and they don't even have a word for stress in their language (at least these were the findings at the time, it might have changed since). But yes, it was a real change of direction book as far as I was concerned so well worth a read if you can get hold of a copy x
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    Not Quite a Noobie miku's Avatar
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    Wow, that's awesome. I love learning about different cultures, especially Native Americans. I'd love to bring my son up in a community like that. Recently I've been day dreaming about a breastfeeding circle. Like just meeting up with other mums in a park or something and breastfeeding our babies whilst we catch up, sing songs lol.
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    Originally Posted by miku
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    Wow, that's awesome. I love learning about different cultures, especially Native Americans. I'd love to bring my son up in a community like that. Recently I've been day dreaming about a breastfeeding circle. Like just meeting up with other mums in a park or something and breastfeeding our babies whilst we catch up, sing songs lol.

    Arrange to meet them in the pub, it freaks everybody out
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    xx

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    Originally Posted by miku
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    .. mums in a park or something and breastfeeding our babies whilst we catch up, sing songs lol.
    What an opportunity for a choral composer, solo mums, mum's chorus, babies chorus, etc. Would make a great animation too.

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    Heavenly Creature Rainbomama's Avatar
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    My co sleeping days are over too,but all mine(7)co slept to some extent,just shared my bed.the youngest was 3 1/2 when he finally slept thro,but continued to "visit"long after..xx

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    Not Quite a Noobie miku's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Rainbomama
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    My co sleeping days are over too,but all mine(7)co slept to some extent,just shared my bed.the youngest was 3 1/2 when he finally slept thro,but continued to "visit"long after..xx
    Aww that's lovely. And 7? Wow. You are my idol lol x

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    Yeah more co-sleepers here - me, Mrs M and little (not so little!) bean who is getting on for four.
    He's had a few goes at choosing that he wants his own bed - in our family room - but so far that's just a novelty and he has always got in with us to go to sleep or made his way back in during the night!
    Biggest problem has been my sleep is terrible and not letting this affect the other two, for a while I slept in another room so it didn't matter too much that I was up late and then possibly up and down or reading all night. Back in the nest now and it's much nicer.

    Set-up? It's just two double mattresses on the floor, although we started off with a 'bed nest' side-car thing. Any further kids will probably just be in with us though, we have the room now heheh

    Oh and Continuum Concept - big influence in our home too, although I do have some misgivings about the 'everything is wonderful in primitive societies' misty vision. Seems to me that in the eagerness to bring positive stuff out and into our society people often take a bit of a shallow view on how things actually operate in other places.
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    Not Quite a Noobie SparkleDevil's Avatar
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    Still in the design stages of our cosleeper.
    A friend is making us one, cos he's cool and awesome!
    Deciding whether to have it on feet or hanging like a bassinet (whilst we still live in a house)
    Here's the picture I gave our friend as inspiration

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    Shed Junkie alices wonderland's Avatar
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    That's cool, I would worry about the hinged drop side. Little fingers in the gap (it does look took tight to get tiny fingers in from the photo (Maybe give it a try with a roll up. If it flattens the skin on the roll up a bit, it would a babies fingers) and the weight of the wood swinging etc. But I do like it.
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    Not Quite a Noobie SparkleDevil's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by alices wonderland
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    That's cool, I would worry about the hinged drop side. Little fingers in the gap (it does look took tight to get tiny fingers in from the photo (Maybe give it a try with a roll up. If it flattens the skin on the roll up a bit, it would a babies fingers) and the weight of the wood swinging etc. But I do like it.
    That was exactly what I said!
    Great minds think alike
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    Always loved the hanging bassinets, my parents used to take us to Denmark for holidays, the families we stayed with all had them.
    Most of theirs were made of wicker though, and didn't have the co sleeping feature - they mostly used them in place of moses baskets.

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    Heavenly Creature Rainbomama's Avatar
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    How about more of a hammock styled sleeping area!no finger traps,snuggly warm x

  19. #19
    UK Hippy Reiki Doula Editor Sarah's Avatar
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    Here are a couple of old pictures of the co-sleeping set up we had at our old flat when Henry was a baby (he is now 8)
    We were on a very limited income - my partner made a platform out of wood that was at the same height as our bed and snuggly fit against the wall. We got a standard single mattress which he cut the end off and we sealed up with material then gaffa tape and out the whole mattress inside a duvet cover i think to properly cover it... then he made that little fence at the end to stop Henry climbing out the bottom. It was great! I was pregnant again when these pictures were taken and had only just stopped breastfeeding Henry - We co-slept with Henry for a while longer and then he moved into a cot at the end of our bed for the most part which freed up the extension for his baby sister... at times we had all five of us in the bed and it was brilliant.... i wanted an extension that was strong enough and long enough that i could potentially just leave the baby exactley where he or she was and move to the other side of them - there was quite a few nights when i ended up curled up on the extension with the baby on the bed.... bedding wise, my little ones slept in baby sleeping bags, i had my own quilt and my partner had the double quilt...nobody got cold and it worked so well
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    cosleeping arrangements can be as simple as getting rid of the bed frame or divan base and mattresses on the floor... and it makes breastfeeding relationships SOOOOOO MUCH EASIER!!!!!


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    If we are to heal the planet, we must begin by healing birthing.
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    Not Quite a Noobie SparkleDevil's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Rainbomama
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    How about more of a hammock styled sleeping area!no finger traps,snuggly warm x
    The hammocks are lovely

  21. #21
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    I got shouted at by the midwives in the hospital for co-sleeping with my eldest, but since he was one of those babies who was happy in mum's arms yet became hysterical with rage when put down (even when apparently sound asleep!) we continued co-sleeping at home. I think the arrangement lasted until he was about four. The two girls were easier, but I co-slept with them too because I wanted to stick with what I knew, and because I wanted to breastfeed them for as long as they wanted it. I don't know how anyone breastfeeds without co-sleeping, as mum would be in and out of bed all night and would be lucky to get any rest! My youngest is now 8 and still sleeps with me, but as we haven't fully moved in we don't really have a proper arrangement yet, the problem being that flatpack beds seem to be a bit of a rarity here, yet the narrow spiral staircase makes getting a bed frame to the upper floors a nightmare. I guess I should see this as a chance to be creative and find some kind of bespoke solution as others on this thread have done. Thanks for the interesting posts and photos!
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